How would you like it if I tightrope walk on your tits? Or your dick? Or your ass? Hey, I’m flexible baby. Man, women, god, child. It’s all the same to me.
O, yes, we were going to talk about the difference between INTJ and ENTJ. OK, if you really wanna know, the way to tell the difference between these two lovely types is to spit up your momma’s ass and wait for it to come back out again. If it comes back out in a minute or two, it’s an ENTJ. If it comes back out in an eternity, it’s an INTJ.
Another way to tell the difference between these two cozy and cuddly types is to go ask Johnny Rotten of Sex Pistols fame if he would like to hold your cat. If he spits in your face and tells you “Go hang yourself you bleeding rotter!” then that is an ENTJ. Definitely. If you go up to Isaac Newton and ask him if he would like to hold your cat and he tells you, “For every holding of a cat there is an equal and opposite reaction of letting a cat go. But, I do like cats and in fact deep down inside I consider myself exactly like a cat, so yes, I will take your cat and put it inside my Egyptian temple where I meditate so that I may get closer to the answers of the universe. Equation done.” So, yeah that would be an INTJ.
INTJs like cats and are like cats emotionally (soulless and distant) and ENTJs could give a fuck about cats.
Now, since we’re on the subject we might as well talk about this thing called the enneagram because there are about three different kinds of ENTJs and before we can even get into comparing them to INTJs we have to be able to distinguish the three types of ENTJs from each other.
OK, first type of ENTJ is the pure ENTJ. That would be the type 8 ENTJ. Think king. Think tyrant. Think throne. You will know this type when you see them. They have huge, gargantuan, arrogant personalities that reek of nobility and experience with watching heads roll. Most of these ENTJs are built like a brick shithouse. Physically intimidating just by their presence. Some of them are power-mad maniacs. Basically, all they want to do in life is to have power. Power is happiness to them. I asked one of them one time, “If you were given a choice between power and happiness, which one would you choose?” The ENTJ looked at me as if I was a bug and had just asked the stupidest question on earth.
Then we got this little charmer over here called the type 7 ENTJ. Let me run you off some names so you may get a flavor: Howard Stern, Gordon Ramsay (of Hell’s Kitchen fame), Simon Cowell (of American Idol fame), Johnny Rotten, and Harvey Keitel to name a few. What do all these guys have in common? I’ll give you a hint. They are really nice guys.
Moving on to the third type of ENTJ and the most pleasant to lay eyes on. Why? Because they are all freaking gorgeous. Ready, here come the names: Milla Jovovich, Leo Dicaprio, Elizabeth Taylor, Axl Rose (O yes he was sexy back in the hey-day), David Bowie, Uma Thurman, and Mick Jagger. Don’t you just want to suck all their dicks? No? You better go spit up your momma’s ass again and come back when you come back to your senses.
Fuck, ENTJs are a pain in the ass. Those last type of ENTJs are the biggest bunch of narcissists on the face of this earth. They are so beautiful, glamorous, charismatic, and dick-suckable. They want you to suck their dick. They insist. You will. It’s just a matter of time.
(author’s note: Upon further reflection, this third type of ENTJ is really enneatype 3 ENFJ and so anything I say in regards to this third type of ENTJ I really mean type 3 ENFJ. All the descriptive stuff for them still stands – heartbreakers, narcissistic, glamorous, charismatic etc. I’ve written an article since this one on the enneatype 3 ENFJ, which is exclusively dedicated to what I am calling the third type of ENTJ in this article.)
OK, now bring in the INTJs. Well, luckily there is approximately one type of INTJ enneagrammatically speaking. Those familiar with the enneagram will know them as type 5 INTJs.
Ready for these lovely and pleasant charmers? Here they come: Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche (of “God is dead” fame), T.S. Eliot (existential poet), Maria Rainier Rilke (existential poet), Oppenheimer (inventor of atomic bomb and quite poetic), Isaac Newton (not an INTP you dumbshits), Emily Dickinson (recluse poet), Kate Bush (crazy sexy women), and Christopher Walken (just for good measure).
I don’t know, can you feel the difference?
Alright, if you can’t, then you have perceptual problems that extend beyond the scope of this article. Hey, I know. Go to this little place called YouTube and start typing in some of these names with “interview” after them. For example, “Kate Bush interview.” Or alternately, type in “Johnny Rotten interview.” Make sure the people were alive in the time of video interviews. Isaac Newton would be a no-go naturally, but then there is this thing called Google. Look up some of the long-dead ones there. Or better yet, if they were a writer, buy some of their books.
If you really want to understand INTJs, buy some Nietzsche books. As far as I’m concerned he was the quintessential INTJ. Nobody topped him in that department. If you want to get a real flavor for some of the major differences between INTJ and ENTJ, read Nietzsche’s, The Case of Wagner, which is one of the books he wrote regarding his famous and influential relationship with the composer Richard Wagner, a major asshole ENTJ of epic proportions. Nonetheless, it will give you a flavor of the differences between the two types.
ENTJs don’t write as much as INTJs because they’re too busy being extraverted assholes but they are still Rationals after all. I recommend checking out some of the written works of Aleister Crowley. I would name him off as a quintessential ENTJ at enneatype 8. Or watch Jack Nicholson in The Shining. Or listen to Ride of the Valkyries. Or do some fucking thing.
And you’re lucky I didn’t ask you to spit up your daddy’s ass.
It’s hard to get through something so vulgar and poorly written. I can’t imagine anyone enjoying it, much less find it enlightening unless your readers are sexual predators or members of a fraternity. Clearly, you don’t understand INTJs, manners or English.
Yes, all that is clear from what you have just written. Thanks for clarifying that. You have done a huge service to man and woman kind.
I agree with Frodo. Why the heck are you so hostile towards NTJ types in general? On the opposite side of the spectrum, you seem to revere INFJs as if they were the perfect gods or goddesses. I noticed that you keep acting as if INFJs have a lot of Fi (hence the article, “Fi in INFJs”), so you assume that in addition to being lovable, analytical, and “perfect”, they also have rich emotions. By substantiating one of their shadow functions, you are calling them the most balanced types, and therefore the most human. Did you ever even stop to think carefully about the depth of TJs’ inner worlds as well? Based on your articles, I highly doubt that. Unless you are a TJ yourself, how can you make such generalized observations about what goes on inside TJs? You must either be an ignorant INFJ or another agitated Fe-user.
Let me clarify one more thing based on your articles about Fi and Fe:
Fe does NOT equal art nor talent in art. I strongly believe that Fi is just as capable, if not more, as Fe in creating beautiful art. Why do I use the word “more”? Because Fe is oriented outwardly, towards other people. It is focused on what is objectively beautiful/ what everyone thinks is beautiful, so it strives to make art that is pleasing to all, even at the expense of individual taste. If an artist strips away her personal values from her painting, what value does it then hold? By doing this, she becomes empty inside, selling herself for the approval of others. In my book, true art is not like this. To me, each piece of true art holds personal, subjective meaning, regardless of outer opinion. You might think that art is mainly Fe because it is expressive, but you need to consider the context to which “expressive” is used.
I don’t know about other people, but as an INTJ, I find most of your articles about INTJs to be highly inaccurate.
Frank Underwood of House of Cards is a typical ENTJ.
Absolutely, he is. Type 3 or Type 8? And his wife, Claire? What type would she be? INTJ 3w4?
Luka is probaly not going to answer the question about enneatype because I don’t think he is familiar with the enneagram.
From my cursory knowledge of this Frank Underwood character you are talking about, I would put him at Type 8 ENTJ. I would type Kevin Spacey as an ISFJ. How is that for a disparity between the actor himself and the character he plays.
I’m also pretty sure most people wouldn’t type Spacey as an ISFJ. But, most people wouldn’t know an ISFJ from a hole in their ass. Obama is also an ISFJ. I can hear the protests coming on already. O well, I tried.
I’m an INFJ with an ENTJ mother. Needless to say after getting yelled at throughout my childhood and subsequently crying, I’d get yelled at again for crying because it was “pointless”. I understand get so much more after finding out her type. Just get it done and she’s happy.
I belatedly came here from your description of ENTJ as “hard dominant”. I don’t understand all of the people who come to your website and object to the style and reject the truth underneath the words, which is where the truth always is anyway. Who are all of these adults who are so deeply offended by profanity? Who are these people who reject a funny description of Isaac Newton that actually lets you understand something true about geniuses like Isaac Newton because it involves profanity? What is this about? Is it really more important to avoid the arbitrary taboo word than it is to realize – hey, that IS what Isaac Newton was like!
????
PS, being an ENTJ sounds GREAT. If reincarnation is real, may that be my destiny. It sounds so relaxing and freeing to just let it all hang out and run roughshod over people. (For real.)
@SeeTheElephant: ENTJ’s get all that drive and ego from a pretty intense sense of their own incapacity, weakness, vulnerability and insufficiency in the face of a big, scary, confusing world.
Every type has its ups and downs. Personally, I’d want nothing to do with either of the Te doms inside my own head.
Hey, how about INTJ enneagram ones? e.g. 1w9. Quite sure Martin Luther (Of the Lutheran church; not to be confused with Martin Luther King) was an INTJ 1w9.
I’m not aware of any INTJ falling at type one on the enneagram, even if a test says they do. To me it is more likely that the person is either a type one enneatype or an INTJ, but not both.
Why are you quite sure that Martin Luther (of Reformation fame) was an INTJ?
If the only understanding of INTJ one has is Nietzsche (goddamn that guy, I can NEVER spell his name) then one is going to have a very hard time seeing most INTJ’s coming. Nietzsche is indeed a flaming INTJ . . . but hardly the best archetype to understand the group as a whole.
INTJ’s (in my mind) are the guys and gals with a hard on to save the world. They are prophets. The “I know what I’m fucking talking about, and because I care I’m trying to let you know, but fuck you all if you don’t listen.” INTJ’s have probably started more minor religious cults that end up with a singular leader banging all the hot women than any other single type. But they’re also the genuine prophetic type. It’s that Ni and Fi. They see what’s coming down the line, and they’re convinced it’s going to be awful. Or they’re convinced the present is awful and needs to change to meet the needs of the future. Whatever, INTJ’s always thing SOMETHING is corrupt and awful.
ENTJ’s (again, in my mind) are televangelists. Either the completely huckstery ones who knowingly go into the business to get rich, but more likely the ones who start as wide eyed, genuine believers who really want to change the world. Their competence and charisma cause their mission to grow and succeed wildly, until one day they’re caught on camera in a hotel room doing blow off the tits of a handful of teenage prostitutes.
Would entjs be very good at reading people? Ni Se Te Ne id seems like a lot of useful stuff to be perceptive and objective about people if they cared to know.
I know so few entjs, and just in a surface way.
There was once this ENTJ I was having dinner with that was getting up all on my nerves due to his assholery. Dang, they just need to crawl up on you and show you who’s boss all the frickin’ time. Assholes.
Afterwards I told my dad (who I think is INTJ) in private…”Gosh this ENTJ…I don’t know…”
He paused for a bit and just said, “These sorts of people aren’t so difficult to handle. Me? I’m not scared. Here’s one piece of advice. If these assholes start to act up, yelling or shouting, or just being plain rude and intimidating, try to take a glimpse of their eyes. And you know what you see? Mischief and amusement. They look all scary, but they’re actually having FUN. So how do you deal with them? Just be straight with them. DON’T get intimidated and look STRAIGHT into their eyes. Hold their eye contact. That’s it.”
Yes. And the fun part starts when you do hold the eye contact.
Boy it’s a surprise for them. Someone’s not impressed with them flexing their muscles? That’s something new for them, something unheard of, an option they didn’t even think of – because they’re so used to everyone bowing to every single one of their wishes.
The one person who is (genuinely) not impressed by them, however, will not get negative attention from them…
At first ,the ENTJ will be puzzled, acting in a weird, silent and awkward way around you. Who are you? Why are you so indifferent to all of their countless talents?
Then they will try to do everything to win you over to their side. That’s how things are supposed to be. They will do whatever it takes to make you your property, no matter what the cost is.
And that’s how you control an ENTJ.
Perfect! [I’m not supposed to be on here, but I really wanted to reply to this]
I myself have noticed the stunned reactions of ENTJs whenever I grow some balls and assert myself. However, one must tread carefully so as not to “offend” an ENTJ – otherwise, you will be dead meat. Lucky thing I’m a lady, because ENTJ men (despite still being assholes) generally take it a notch down with women.
With men, it’s a different story: They will screen for alpha male dominance and swiftly bully “weaker males” to death. What they are looking for are males that can hold their own, who will not cower upon the ENTJ asshole’s intimidation tactics. These males are then kept in his “circle,” as part of his “property” as you say. But cower in front of them and be prepared to die! It’s like what the ENTJ seems to want (intimidation, submission) is exactly what he does NOT respect. But ENTJs will not let themselves be dominated either – don’t even think about it, unless you can really handle it nobly and with high competence. Otherwise, see you at your funeral!
Now with women. I think ENTJ men are hot for CHALLENGING women. I think ISTP women are perfect for ENTJ men – it just seems to fit so perfectly in my head. I remember I was once out drinking with an ENTJ dude, and in his inebriation he was coughing up cornballs that made me roll my eyes multiple times. He said this: “I envision my partner to be like…a sleek, dark, BLACK horse. She will be CHALLENGING – not dominating!…but challenging!” (Ugh, please bitch!) That made me think that perhaps ISTP is the perfect match for ENTJs. A sexy, strong woman who sees through all of ENTJs’ bullshit and is not impressed? Like you said, it will drive the ENTJ crazy, mad for making that woman his.
It kind of made me think of the Stormy Daniels incident with Donald Trump. I have no idea whether this story was actually real, but I recall that in the 60 minutes interview, Stormy claimed that she apparently lost her patience listening to Trump babble on and on about himself in the hotel room…so she took a magazine with his picture on the front cover and spanked his ass multiple times – and THAT TURNED HIM ON. Yep, that’s probably ENTJ men really want. Perhaps not full-on domination, but a woman who’s strong, principled, and unwilling to give in so easily to the ENTJ’s power and charisma and money. Someone who’ll mold him into a proper man, not just some narcissistic, insecure boy that gets by through bullshitting and assholery.
I really think women are key to ENTJ men’s growth. They could really fly high once they learn some basic manners and keep their full-blown narcissistic tendencies in check. They would also gain a more noble purpose for all their power pursuits. But a man will never be the reason for a male ENTJs’ self-evolution. It’s got to be a woman. And eventually children I guess….if…he even wants children…
A high desire for control yields an equally high desire to BE controlled. Te dominance and Fi inferior.